Frivolist

5 problems with living in the future

People like to daydream about what the future may hold, but when those prospects consume your thoughts more than the present, there’s a real risk of living your own mental and emotional nightmare. Make a conscious effort to enjoy the here and now by recognizing these problems with overthinking life’s uncertainties.

1. You can’t enjoy the present

How will you ever find success and happiness in the future if you can’t enjoy right now? It’s a classic catch-22. Because focusing on tomorrow today won’t end as long as you live because as long as you live there will always be today and tomorrow. Plan for the future, sure, but don’t let the what-ifs take away from your enjoyment of the present. You get one shot at today, and you’ll never get it again.


2. It can destroy relationships

I’ve been cheated on in the past by guys who’ve told me how much they love me, who were affectionate, who genuinely enjoyed spending time with me – but that didn’t stop them from lying and stepping out. The effect of that behavior makes it harder to build new, healthier relationships, because I often worry if the next guy will do the same in the future – and if I’m constantly sleuthing for problems, problems will arise.

I’ve personally found that for me to keep myself in check in this regard is with therapy: talking with someone regularly about my doubts, fears, and ultimately the reinforcement of my own self-worth (I’m better off being single than letting a cheater control my emotions), and I recommend seeking professional help if you’re also feeling lonely in this world.

3. The anxiety will make you miserable

If you’re worrying about the future, you’re probably not concentrating on all the wonderful possibilities it holds. Instead, human nature is honing in on everything that can go wrong, leading to stress and anxiety. There have been times in my own life where my pessimism about what hasn’t even happened yet has physically debilitated me to the point that I can’t get out of bed. I do find solace in a daily routine and checklist, however, that firmly keeps me moving at today’s pace instead of tomorrow’s.

4. Worrying about affects what good may come

There are amazing things ahead for you, but your endless apprehension about the future can and will affect what’s to come. Every decision we make sets the foundation for what’s next, and you’re doing yourself a disservice (perhaps lifelong) by allowing negativity to cloud your judgment. Not to say that you should rest on your laurels and let the world dictate what happens to you, but also don’t count yourself out before the countdown is done.

5. It’s out of your control

You are only one tiny influence on your future. The rest – all the people and events that live right outside your door – have greater impact, and there’s no way you can control it. So don’t try. Live your best in-the-moment life and let nature take its course with your hands on the wheel. You never know where you’ll end up – and that’s the best part.

Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He spends his time writing from the beach with his dog Jaxon. Connect with Mikey on Instagram @mikeyrox

Mikey Rox

Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and blogger whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He lives with his husband and their cuddle-buddy furbaby, Jaxon. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox.

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