Making a difference: The Black & Pink PenPals Project supports LGBTQ+ incarcerated people

For LGBTQ+ people behind bars, isolation can be one of the most painful aspects of incarceration. Separated from supportive communities, many face discrimination, abuse, and neglect. That’s where Black & Pink’s PenPal program steps in—offering vital connection, affirmation, and harm reduction through the power of letters.

Black & Pink, a national organization dedicated to prison abolition and LGBTQ+ justice, coordinates a robust PenPal program that pairs incarcerated LGBTQ+ individuals and people living with HIV/AIDS with supporters on the outside. This initiative fosters meaningful relationships through written correspondence, providing encouragement, solidarity, and a lifeline to a world beyond prison walls.

Why PenPals Matter

For many LGBTQ+ incarcerated people, receiving a letter is more than just a small comfort—it’s an act of resistance against a system designed to erase and dehumanize them. Mail Call is a public event in most prisons, and when a name is called, it signals to guards and fellow incarcerated people alike that someone on the outside cares. This simple act can serve as a protective factor, reducing vulnerability to violence and neglect within the prison system.

“The act of writing and receiving letters is about survival,” Black & Pink organizers emphasize. “It reminds people that they are not forgotten.”

Beyond emotional support, these correspondences help counter the systemic injustices of incarceration. PenPals learn about the harsh realities of the prison system firsthand and often feel compelled to take action—whether through advocacy, community organizing, or deeper engagement with abolitionist movements.

Becoming an Awesome PenPal

Signing up for the Black & Pink PenPal program is an opportunity to engage in transformative justice and build a connection rooted in mutual support and respect. But before diving in, prospective PenPals are encouraged to reflect on their motivations and capacity for commitment.

Ask Yourself:

1. Why do I want to write to someone in prison?
   Understanding personal motivations helps ensure that participation is intentional and meaningful. Black & Pink encourages PenPals to challenge their own assumptions about incarcerated people and commit to building relationships grounded in respect and care.
2. What is my capacity?
   A one-time letter can be uplifting, but consistency is key. Black & Pink recommends writing at least twice a month and being upfront with PenPals about how often you can correspond.
3. How will I process the realities of the prison system?
   Corresponding with an incarcerated person can be an eye-opening experience, exposing the injustices of incarceration firsthand. It’s important to have a support system in place to process these conversations and to engage with communities working toward prison abolition.

Navigating the PenPal Relationship

Building a connection with an incarcerated PenPal is a unique experience that requires thoughtfulness and care. Here are a few key considerations:

• Respect and Affirmation: Avoid speaking down to or pitying your PenPal. Treat them as an equal, and acknowledge their agency and resilience.
• Boundaries and Transparency: Be clear about personal boundaries and respect those set by your PenPal. If you can no longer continue writing, inform Black & Pink so they can find a new correspondent.
• Privacy and Safety: All prison mail is monitored, so be mindful of what you share. If disclosing personal details makes you uncomfortable, consider using a P.O. box or an online mail service.
• Patience: Prison mail systems are slow and unpredictable. Don’t be discouraged if a reply takes weeks or months—your letters still matter.
• No Financial Obligation: While some PenPals choose to send funds or care packages, this is never an expectation. If you do offer financial support, be clear about what you can provide and how often.

How to Get Started

Writing to an incarcerated LGBTQ+ person is easier than ever, with multiple options available. Traditional “snail mail” letters remain the most reliable method, but online services like JMail, JPay, and Corrlinks offer digital alternatives. Black & Pink provides guidance on prison mailing regulations, including restrictions on greeting cards, colored paper, and envelope labels in certain states.

New PenPals can browse Black & Pink’s online directory to find an incarcerated correspondent whose interests align with theirs. Many PenPals find that these connections grow into long-term friendships, expanding their understanding of the carceral system and deepening their commitment to social justice.

Join the Movement

Becoming a Black & Pink PenPal is a simple yet powerful way to support LGBTQ+ people impacted by incarceration. Whether you’re looking to build a one-on-one connection, amplify the voices of incarcerated individuals, or engage in broader advocacy work, this program offers an entry point into meaningful activism.

“Every letter reminds someone that they are seen, valued, and not alone,” says Black & Pink. “Together, we build a future where no one is left behind.”

To learn more and sign up for the Black & Pink PenPal program, visit blackandpink.org.